by Julie Brown on June 24, 2011
Tunnel Vision will make you blind
Often times, I find myself encountering my life as being measured by various seemingly pivotal events, like graduating from college, moving to a new house, or reorganizing the kitchen cupboards, as if the events are like crossing a finish line. And for the most part the emphasis of getting there is frequently experienced as a tunnel. All energies are focused on getting to the end of the tunnel because as soon as I am there life begins again. As soon as I graduate I will have more time to exercise, as soon as I move to this new house I will have more time to spend writing, as soon as … Important aspects of life, like general health, relationships and fun, get put on hold until I get from point A to point B.
Working for the weekend or a vacation can give us hope for time off to relax and enjoy ourselves. It allows us to know there is light at the end of the tunnel – that it will be better as soon as this happens. I am not sure if by doing this, it allows us to be more focused at tasks at hand, or it is an illusion. That really there is no such thing as getting there, that life is a series of events and once one is completed another is there to fill it’s place. The element that disturbs me is tasks will always appear, the house needs to be cleaned, the project at work will be replaced by another project. And before we know it, the important elements of our life, health and relationships, don’t seem to be as important.
Inevitably life brings us projects or times when our lives are tunnel focused. I am not sure if this is the way our society is set up, or some people have more of propensity to be like this, but I wonder how life can be more holistic? That in order to stay focused on one area, that basic self care like healthy eating and exercise is a mandatory part of the process.
How do we establish our base-line of priorities? Knowing that we need to eat a certain way and be physically active and feel connected to people to be productive. That our task or project becomes an aspect of our lives, but not the central force.
by Julie Brown on May 9, 2011
Internal Solace
Spring in New Mexico is awake with wind gusts and dry brittle weather that is rattling and disturbing. Everyone experiences various weather patterns as jarring at times. Wind is definitely mine, as I find it ungrounding and my refuge in the hills or in the backyard lose the pleasant allure. I notice myself easily aggravated, not as patient and sometimes a little angry. Blame it on the wind.
And speaking to an insightful friend, she brought up her own storm in her intimate relationship, and very thoughtfully brought up how unseated she became when her relationship is not smooth. It is so easy to define ourselves according to our life circumstances; the temperature of our relationships, the discomfort in our working environment, and our physical well being.
The idea of staying anchored in the midst of the 40 mph gusts blasting at my window or when external circumstances are unfriendly at best, can be challenging. And how can we stay and cultivate an internal reality that is solid and holds the essence of our natural strength? It is not to say that the external circumstances will not affect us as we experience and feel our way through life. But how can the circumstances become a component of our existence or even the catalyst for shift, change or acceptance but not the center?
My definition of personal strength has changed over the years. It used to pertain to the ability to endure dark times, and be able to exert my power
and claim my position. The change in how I define my personal strength has to do with realizing power may have less to do with force but more with contemplation. And your relationships may not be smooth sailing, and your friend my have unflattering opinions of you, and your personal health may be a mess. And maybe this is an opportunity to tap into infinite reserves of personal strength. Maybe when you feel plowed over by what the world is presenting you, you could just stop for a moment. Tune into the sensation and offer yourself unconditional love. Find your way to the moment and see if you can touch into the comfort or warmth that exists within you. Ultimately we have so little control of anything. Our inner world is ours to shine light on whatever we want.
by Julie Brown on April 5, 2011
Leaning into the Unrest, Appreciating each Breath
The planetary climate right now is featuring a tremendous amount of intense energy and everyone is feeling it on one level or another. Tsunamis, air raids, nuclear threats, wars, famine and continual unrest are some examples of how this energy is unfolding. The intensity is naturally affecting each of us on personal and community level. As mindful beings how do we make sense of the unrest and assist in transformation and healing? On what level are we supposed to assist in change or to surrender and trust?
Originating in Mayan tradition the year 2012 signifies an intense year of change and possibly destruction. The year has taken on all kinds of focus in various new age streams and has become mainstream enough that even Hollywood has jumped in and produced a movie called, “2010.” For the most part, I don’t pay much attention to whether people interpret the significance of 2012 as the end of the world or the beginning of spiritual enlightenment. I find getting involved in ideas or theories disconnecting, and it doesn’t allow me to stay in the flow of trusting myself. I also find distaste with the perspective that some people will be saved and others will be left behind. This perspective feels so judgmental and has the potential to elicit fear. I align myself with the belief we are all equally loved and seen as worthy no matter what.
So how can we witness so much occurring in the world and be on the brink of 2012 and not feel like there is a connection? We certainly are going through some level of transformation on a planetary level and whether this is connected to 2012, I don’t know. Yes, one hopes that current predictions fuel waking up to appreciate the now, rather than being paralyzed by fear because it’s impossible to know precisely what will unfold and what shape these changes will take. It seems like throughout history there have been intense cycles, some more intense than others. The connection to one date or time, again, I am not sure, but I do know I want to focus my personal energy as constructively and healing as possible.
The question that continues to occur for me is how can I be a contributing productive citizen in all this change. Do I become active or surrender? To actively participate we can financially support movements to assist people in the recovering from the Tsunami, we can stay active in politics, or join prayer circles or dedicate our daily practices to help support the transformation. However we decide to hold the change, it is important to recognize the need to stay open. We may feel powerless in the midst of the turmoil but each action we take with an open heart has a positive effect on the world.
On a personal level this may be challenging to feel ease and comfort in our own skin when the intense energy may cause fear and doubt to appear. Years ago, I read a transformative book called, “How Then, Shall We Live,” by Wayne Muller a therapist and minister who worked with terminal AIDS patients. In working with this population, Muller found that the patients were discovering a key component to living in the presence of their terminal condition; life is precious so be in the now. The book really woke me up to how often I am not paying attention and feeling gratitude for my experiences. This is not meant to feed fear, but it can open an interesting point and dialogue about how living with the presence of our mortality changes the tapestry of our existence.
With this, how do we keep coming back to the preciousness of each breath, each experience, challenging or easy, and really take stock in being present. How do we ground our energy, see the changes in the world in a way that we can help shine light, pray in a new way. It begins here, with each of us, staying centered and growing and changing.
by Julie Brown on March 1, 2011
Intuition as a Lifestyle
Living my life while embracing guidance as my staple diet has moved me from a dull gray to living in rooms with sunshine yellow walls. I use intuition everyday in all aspects of my life. It affects whether I satiate myself with fresh eggs or pear juice, how I focus my attention, improving my health and relationships, and manifesting my dream life. Intuition is our internal knowing that we all have, and it avails itself in multiple forms: through feelings and signs, through dreams and unexpected “aha” insights. It is available to serve us in our life challenges and living out our creative dreams. Because we are worth it. We deserve to choose intuitive living as a way of trusting our choices and experience and finding more ease in living. Bottom line, intuition is great for self-esteem, health, wealth, happiness and adventurous beautiful living.
Because embracing guidance as a staple diet allows the universe to co-conspire for our success.
My personal story of intuition wake-up is relatively ordinary. I attended UNM for a graduate degree in visual art and spent three plus years in a personal healing crisis. The time was contemplative, reflecting most of my past choices, including going to grad school, were motivated by pain. For the first time in ten years, my puritan work ethic took a hiatus; I felt numb as I molded clay sculptures and created installations. My energy was low, I was depressed and felt this nagging ache of knowing there was something more but not knowing what it was. While, I was able to eek my way through to graduate, post-thesis show, I declared I was no longer an artist. The whole academic process made me question my natural intuitive working style and I left doubting myself, my hunches in a way that made it clear I needed to shift gears.
The dry spell was an incredible gift as it was the impetus to find my path back to intuition. I did my first reiki attunement and started attending classes on channeling, intuitive development and less than two years later became a reiki master. I started doing hands-on reiki sessions and guidance came quickly and easily for clients on the table. The path continued to bring my personal life into a new level of healing, which cleared ingrained patterns that stood in my way of making empowered choices. By no means has this intuitive path been painless, as growth often means shifting and healing in order to get where you want to go. But it has moved my life from the ordinary to the extraordinary. And I am full of awe when I consider how the path has turbo-charged my ability to manifest and create the life of my dreams. It allowed me to quit doing on-call temporary work, start my own business, where I assist people to connect to their innate guidance, enhance relationships, buy my dream house with my partner, spend time indulging in hiking and gardening and living fluidly.
Most importantly is everyday intuition is a creative lifestyle choice that allows me to play moment to moment. I don’t arrive at a final destination where the inner work stops, but each day I engage in growing and embracing the adventure in an empowered way.
So how can you incorporate guidance as your staple diet? Everyday choices allow us to assimilate facts, information, and peruse consumer reports on the Internet to make sure we are making the “right” choice. But when you open to trusting your hunches, your feelings, your direct messages, watch out, the whole equation changes. An example of being in the intuitive flow is when I bought a VW that would have been way out of my financial league. Not only was the price right but I also acquired the perfect mechanic who charges me less than my old beater cars ever cost to fix. If I followed what I learned from consumer reports and not the luxurious comfort I felt when driving it, I would have missed an amazing time when the universe and my intuition were co-conspiring for me. Intuition can be your number one ally, to live in an easy joyful flow. It also helps increase your energy and find solutions to things that feel unsolvable. It has the ability to open you to more compassion and less judgment about yourself and the world. And most importantly, it allows you to open up to your adventure as an empowered creator who trusts that what is needed will arrive.
by Julie Brown on January 31, 2011
Being Backstage
A curious aspect of intuitive living is the ability to work behind the scenes. I sometimes imagine our lives are a big production play, where great action, challenges and struggles take place center stage. The phrase “what you see is what you get,” confirms the concept that our lives are only what they appear to be and nothing more. But if our lives are like a stage production, what happens behind the scenes? Behind the curtain is all the intricate workings of the momentum of the play: the lights, the stage directions, and the underlying script. So what materializes if you allow yourself to understand that there is an opportunity to make changes backstage?
An aspect of intuitive work that continues to leave me awestruck is the power we all have to work with unseen elements of our current life. For instance, we may be struggling with a co-worker or family member. In the past we walk toward it and confront it head on through dialogue and possible heated exchanges. Initially, there may be a truce and the tension breaks but two months later you are back in the same boat, with the same struggle. Or maybe you are trying to create the perfect financial opportunities by going out and pounding the pavement only to find yourself in the same meaningless work you had before.
Staying with the stage analogy, nothing has changed behind the scenes: the lighting and stage directions are the same. You find another job with different characters, but you face the same difficult dynamics. What happens if you ask your self to go back stage? This could happen through visualizations, it may be through actively working with your dreams, or through creative exploration. For example, you do some journaling around employment and notice it feels sluggish and uninspired. This is valuable information and from this place you have potential to create change. Ask energy to build around new work opportunities by envisioning money coming from a place where you are inspired and feel pleasure. Use affirmations, visualizations, prayers, meditation, journaling and anything else to help you reestablish impulsion to reenergize what you are working to create. Take your time with this process; you may have to do this behind the scene for months on end before you are ready to step back on stage.
Working behind the scenes asks us to step out of frustrating roles and open to finding new approaches. Even if going backstage is initially too challenging, just let go and surrender your stance and see what happens. The fun thing about working behind the scenes is recognizing you can create what you want: peace, joy, prosperity and just a calm understanding more readily than trying to find it outside yourself. Imagine living your life and being the director and the actor.
by Julie Brown on January 18, 2011
Reflective New Year Planning
Most of us use certain time markers like New Years to gauge our personal success. Planning resolutions and dreaming in new endeavors can be an exciting time. And it can be challenging not to experience regrets or feelings of discouragement over things that did not come to fruition. Often this reflection can bring in negative thinking patterns and old ideas about ourselves that can jam the upcoming process of being on the precipice of what is next. I wonder how to enter this forward setting period in a spacious way to objectively get to know whether we are setting ourselves up for success or failure.
In our left-brained society most of us are familiar with the process of goal setting in terms of short term, within weeks or months, and longer term the upcoming year or decade. The technique is helpful to be clear about what direction you are heading. If your ten-year goal is to live debt-free, it is important to make decisions today to support this. It may not be in your best interest to carry credit cards or go on a trip that you don’t have the money for. And even though goal setting has plenty of merits, it does adhere to the land of logic rather than the realm of unexpected magical surprise.
So how can we accurately get perspective of what we want to accomplish? I find getting to know what you want and why is incredibly beneficial as a precursor to the manifesting process. If your goal is to be debt-free in ten years and in the past year you have actually accrued more, how do you assess this? Remember to be realistic, this may have been a hard year with a lot of unexpected expenses occurred. And there is the classic story which you can find yourself starring in, inadvertently setting yourself up for failure. It may be impossible to make any progress with debt because incoming and outgoing are about equal and staying stable is the best you can do. What does your goal really tell you about yourself? Is it reflecting your negative opinion of yourself with debt, like considering yourself financially irresponsible? What is the core value that you are attaching to the goal?
I find it helpful to write goals down and be willing to sit with them for a period of time. Set up a five-minute meditation or some time to do some free-form writing and see what appears. By examining it, you may learn about your fears around your financial future. You may also recognize that your holding onto debt is actually creating more debt rather than releasing it. An important thing about getting in touch with your coming resolution is rediscovering your core needs and claim what you want from a place of power.
Interestingly, I recently came across the idea of a “bucket list,” a list of things that you want to do before you die. One piece I like about this is, we may make the goal to hike the Grand Canyon as part of our yearly resolution and find ourselves with a broken ankle two weeks before departure. If it is on a “bucket list,” we open to the simple equation of the right time and space to frame what we want. It is an interesting process to turn over our expectations of how things should be, and trust that the elements align at the perfect moment to create what we want. Blessings. May 2011 find you encountering many perfect moments!
by Julie Brown on January 18, 2011
Set your life on Fire
I love the concept of inspired living and am curious how to cultivate a healthy space to feel and indulge in passionate existence. How do we inject enthusiasm to our daily living? More than once, I have fallen folly to waiting for the inspiration bus to come along and for the most part, I am left sitting on the bus stop. Being inspired by something or someone may seem like the source of inspiration but what if we could recognize that each of us has the ability to tap into our muse. Not to say that this energy is always readily available but when our experiences get a little dull around the edges, how can we spice it up?
Most people I see following their blissful paths are fired up about what they are doing and are letting their energy focus in a passionate direction. I find inspiration is an energy and in order to tune into or cultivate it, you may have to whittle out space to get to know it. What are you passionate about? What gets the hairs on your arms standing up, what makes you lose sleep at night and what gets you fired up? And if you feel like you don’t know, what is it that you like doing? All of us connect with passion in various ways, whether it is trekking down a trail, reading, listening to music, or being involved in practice that makes you feel alive. Be willing to find parts of your life that make you feel right, and connected to the present moment.
Creating space to treat inspiration as an act of devotion to being fully present in your senses allows for creativity, joy, fun, pleasure and opening is intriguing. What are the elements that exist in your life that are inspiring? How can you get to know this energy and find ways to call it in when you are involved in tasks that are hardly exciting? Could you infuse passion in bookkeeping or cleaning the bathroom? I don’t think it is possible to force feelings but maybe our inspired time will give us a little more patience with arduous tasks. Let your fire burn through your life.
by Julie Brown on January 18, 2011
Let me tell you what I think
Recently, I found myself in conversation with a friend who is creating some amazing things in her life. I quickly began spouting off ideas based on my experience, giving advice and basically not regarding her process. It did not occur to me to ask her if she wanted feedback or just close listening. In reflection, I noticed that offering opinions are not always a way to support and honor each other. Sometimes it can even be harmful. Most of us engage with each other with little awareness of how we relate, we tell each other what we think and give lots of unsolicited advice. I find myself wondering about the root of this sort of discourse.
Why do we assume people need to know what we think? Do we have something amazing to offer? Or is it just a place to spill our busy minds through expression? I am not disregarding the power of collaborative processes because in the right context, brainstorming can create powerful results. What I am questioning is when it is appropriate to express opinions and ideas instead of just listening?
How would conversations unfold if we refrained from giving advice and sought to really understand? Could our life and relationships change if we were willing to just listen and refrain from saying anything? Everyone has their own rhythm and by being willing to allow for what seems like uncomfortable silence, we may make room for a person’s deeper experience. Or perhaps your friend routinely invites feedback, but this inspires them to stop listening to their own guidance while unearthing unhealthy dependency. If this is true, is this role truly serving?
The truly miraculous possibility in regards to refraining from giving our opinions is trusting that our loved ones deserve and know how to figure it out. It also allows our relationships to evolve into each of us potentially asking for what we need and not assuming we know what others need. Keeping lips locked and listening and observing can open up new spaces of self-awareness and change dimensions in close interactions.
by Julie Brown on January 18, 2011
Lights, Camera, Refrain from Action
I spent this glorious full moon equinox sleepless, stumbling through mini-epiphanies in the middle of the night. My theme this month seemed focused on the idea of reacting, and how often this sort of action creates a chain reaction that sometimes feels like a locomotive without brakes. Reaction is an action taken in response to something else. When I was a teenager working with animals, I learned quickly to stay anchored in the midst of a dog tugging on a leash or a horse ready to tuck his haunches and run. In both situations, the best option was to lead the action rather than react to the animal. But this lesson came through trial and error, after many times of feeing frustrated and reactionary. And every time I found myself responding rather than leading, I became ungrounded and was no longer the one calling the shots. So what does it mean to call your owns shots, act from the core place of empowerment rather than in response to something else?
Most of us have some experience in relationships where we experience our reactions. For instance a friend asks you to do something that you really don’t want to do or you don’t have time to do. You react and quickly say yes and hurry through the task. Afterward, your friend feels slighted because you half-heartedly helped and you feel resentful because you said yes when you wanted to say no. So in the end it was a lose-lose proposition. Often times we don’t even know we react. Sometimes it happens before we are even aware, or we are avoiding the feelings of guilt, or it’s a habitual response to external stimuli. Is reaction really helpful? Are you really leading your life or being lead by external forces?
So how do we act from a place of mindfulness? How do we stop a cycle of being reactive and take responsibility for our personal power? The first step to any kind of change is awareness. If you recognize reaction is one of your tendencies, it could be time to really dive into a new awareness around it. Get to know this part of yourself. Are there times when you are more reactive than others, or does it happen more frequently with certain people? One way to get more of a handle on it is to slow down the process in which you take action. Refrain from the “doing” stage until you are clear where you want to go and it feels like it is an empowered place. In situations when you are face to face with someone and feel your emotional triggers come up, just take a moment and breathe. You can always say to someone you need sometime to think about something and will get back to them later. Most importantly, be gentle in working with change, as things soften and become more manageable with loving-kindness.
by Julie Brown on January 18, 2011
The Dis-empowerment of Speculation
You go out on a limb and dare to contact and estranged friend and receive no response. You send your mentor your prized novel and haven’t heard back. Your best friend doesn’t show up to meet you for coffee.
Have you ever found your self in a similar situation, where you find yourself in a whirlwind of speculating, because you don’t have any concrete information and are left with your lovely little mind concocting various narratives? It is uncomfortable to not know what is happening and in that space we often find our worried mind running laps trying to figure it out. And how often does our troubled mind really find the truth?
Do you ever find yourself in a situation when you don’t hear from someone after leaving a few messages and find your mind racing with worry? Because you feel pressure, you try to release it by taking it to the next level by processing with other people about what you “think” is going on. Later you find out the wires were crossed and this person never received the message, or went away on a spur-of-the-moment backpacking trip without cell reception, or was up to their eyeballs in too much work. The guessing just overused your adrenals and wasted precious time.
Speculation coming from the mind is not a form of intuition. It is just mind garble, meant to fill up time with worry and takes you away from your natural wisdom and power. What I find curious is the need to create something in our minds, to know what is happening so we feel comfortable. What would happen if we just stayed in the place of unknowing and made a decision to just wait and see. This is a perfect time to check in with intuition. ‘Is this person okay? Do I need to take action?’ And just practice not jumping to conclusions, but observe what is arising, and what this unknowing tells you about yourself. Being in the dark has the potential to light up inner resources you haven’t accessed before. It is also an opportunity to tune into how your body responds, tightening of stomach and heart beating faster, and get to know these spaces of anxiousness.
